THE BEARD AU MINGLING POST

[quu]

Welcome back to Feng's. You know the drill. Without further warning, here's

The BEARD AU Meme

Hello, your character now has a beard. Probably you want to know why. Please pick one of the options below and post accordingly:

1. Shut up, I just have a beard ok.
2. PIRATES. On a pirate ship. Arrrrr.
3. A beard is the most feminine thing it is possible to have.
4. A beard is the most humiliating thing it is possible to have.
5. Office oyajis! You have beards b/c you're old and white collar.
6. Heh, this beard is just.... a face wig! /rips it off
7. Spock with a beard? I think not (You're your evil twin.)
8. Whatever reason you want.

Tag out and be ludicrous please. Thanks.

There maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay or may not be NPCs rolling around in this meme. (Probably, yes.)

Comments

Sweet!

[tigerbomb]

Having a beard was the most grown up decision he had EVER made. Unsurprisingly though, it also caused Zell to start having terrible thoughts. For starters, he started putting cat hair in everyone's water. If that wasn't bad enough, he started catching himself doing horrid things like drinking the last of the milk and putting the carton back and capitalizing every other letter in a typed sentence. Clearly this beard was making him act so wrong, but it felt SO RIGHT.

It was a hard choice of shaving it off and reverting to his young boyish face, or keeping it and slowly falling into darkness.

[yowokomete]

Shonagon stared at him skeptically, not buying his excuse for a second.

"I really don't think it's the beard's fault, Zell."

[tigerbomb]

How could she doubt him? She didn't know what he was going through. How could she, a bitch riding atop society know ANYTHING about him!? He looked down his nose on her, fully using all 2 inches of height he had over her to make sure she knew he was displeased.

There would be hell to pay later. Try wearing so many layers when one of them is covered in ink, he thought menacingly.

"I'm sorry you think that."

3

[yowokomete]

Shonagon kneels with a mirror in her lap, busily braiding her beard as intricately as possible. It wouldn't do to be seen with an ungroomed face, after all!

Re: 3

[tigerbomb]

"It's uneven towards the top", he said indifferently, just passing by. Silently he cackled to himself.

Re: 3

[hagswallop]

"Your messing it up!" Cludig bemoans looking aghast. "How are you going to frighten away enemies with it looking sooo....groomed?!" Even saying the word seemed to hurt her physically.

3

[hagswallop]

Finally, after so many years of teasing and hoping against hope it was here. Her very own beard. No more wispy whiskers but a dense thicket of intimidating fur. Truly now, she was a proper Hag Lady! If she only had some bird bones for decoration. Or a slow moving centipede. Then she could really snazz it up!

A content crooning purr like that of dying egret escaped her as she stroked her dingy and course beard oh so lovingly. Maybe she should trim a few hairs and leave some in a few peoples drinks in celebration.

5 ha ha how did this get so tl;dr

[nicecollarbones]

[It's odd, being old. Getting old has never really factored into his plans; for a long time, he thought he'd be lucky to make it to thirty without a knife in his back. (He hadn't. The knife had been ill-aimed.)

It's odd, therefore, being old; and not just old, but the kind of old with a respectable office and a respectable wardrobe, and a job that is civilized in process if not in nature. He's never been the directorial type -- if working with people had been difficult, then managing them was worse. But there was a void, and, as former Chief Kirihara had explained to him, she needed him to fill it, and anyway, what else was he going to do, drink away the rest of his life?

He'd refused. It hadn't mattered.

And so here he is: Old, wearing a suit, and wrestling with paperwork. Supervising people. Having a secretary who brings him coffee, and lunching at the same hour every day. Some days, that's fine, even almost good. Some days, it's claustrophobic enough he almost wishes for that knife in his back.

Today is the latter, which is why he is out of his office and taking a stroll among the cubicles. Care to catch his attention?]